I'm Going to be a Hit at Parties

The third trimester has hit me like a ton of bricks and I still have two months to go.

I don't like to complain about my pregnancy because it makes it seem like I'm ungrateful for the amazing, wonderful daughter growing inside of me. But seriously, I'm done being pregnant.

I've had my fill of nausea, swelling, fatigue, general uncomfortableness, and mood swings. Also, it would be nice to be able to bend over without a) feeling someone else's bones poke into my ribs and b) make me have to pee.

Pregnancy is a truly wonderful, amazing thing that I am awed my body is capable of. But it is not what they make it out to be on TV. I don't get to sit around all day with my feet up while family waits on me hand and foot. I'm not glowing. In fact, I'm usually sweating and out of breath. Oh, and did I mention my ankle bone has disappeared? Yeah, that nobby bone on the inside of your ankle...mine seems to have been sucked into my skin and is now in hiding. Granted, it makes shaving the ankle area easier, but shaving anything else is just about impossible.

If you've been following me on Twitter, you already know that today has not been a good day for me emotionally. It's been building for awhile and last night the dam broke. I just started crying for no good reason (or, to be more specific, because I had been acting bitchy all evening and hence ruined it) and now it seems I have only two settings: bitch and crying woman. I'm going to be a hit at parties.

This did not resolve itself with a decent night's sleep. Oh, no. Instead, I almost bitched out a saleswoman at one store and wanted to cry after an encounter at another. After my much-needed pumpkin spice latte (which I cannot wait to have caffeinated again, by the way) and reading a bit of Tina Fey's Bossypants in Barnes and Noble, I was feeling a little better. And then I realized I still had to go grocery shopping and my feet were big, fiery, swollen blobs at the end of my legs.

I realize that this post will probably make women who haven't been pregnant think twice about getting knocked up. Just remember that pregnancy is different for every woman...but there are some pretty shitty things that happen to you that no one seems to mention beforehand. It will all be worth it in the end. I just feel like the end is a very long way away. And in the meantime, my bedtime keeps getting earlier and earlier.